How I saved my army ensign

Introduction of high

Nowadays, it has become fashionable to talk about all kinds of high matters.

  • Aura.
  • Chakras
  • Dark and Light forces.
  • Extrapolation.
  • Bioenergy.
  • Psychic abilities.
  • Yin and Yang.
  • Exorcism
  • Black and white sensory.
  • Yes, also this feng shui made by daoism.

You will understand nothing from where it happened. Or an egg from an egg. Do not steal, do not kill. What is the karma of a person? He filled up such, and the world immediately became better, because, like, one scum less. And do not steal? Let him go, darling, got more? So with him, and so bad, in three days you will not cheat. Do not commit adultery? What is that supposed to mean? Dr. .. and it doesn’t leak into your socks? It helps you to keep yourself and your partner. By the way, they themselves say god is love. Just what kind of love without deep penetrations? Maybe not yin and yang? He says, “It’s not,” he says, “ even if you place your brainstorm. Blessed is he who believed.

Now everything is so difficult, so confusing. But it seemed so much simpler. And much more primitive. There is no god. Hell and heaven, respectively, too. The commander has said so. What is the case for the Leningrad Office? There is no time for scientific debates. Stroybat, this is not a department of Marxist-Leninist philosophy for you. Here you are the builders of communism. Do you feel the flight of thought? We are ours, we will build a new world. If we plow from the fence and before lunch. Therefore, take more, throw further. At first, I was jarred by such primitivism. I love you, I’m not the one who was the commander, I’m not the battalion, I’m not the battalion. And grandfathers with scoops too. And the sergeants, who are descended from the gomosapiensov hated fierce hatred. At first, they were all angry at me. They have been shit to the soul. I suffered. It was recorded that I was able to get into the construction of the battalion.

How it all began

I’m already a little bit of the army. I learned to distinguish where a person is, and where a radish is; who is cool and who is schmuck; who can go, and who better to bypass the tenth road. I like the creative potential of the creative potential of the creative potential. Finally, I found if I didn’t like any minimized people.

If you’re on the day, you’ve received it. To give money was just like that zapadlo. It’s not a young, eighteen-year-old organism. Go to the soldiers’ tea, buy all the cakes and gobble up in one sitting? It wasn’t the way it’s been accepted.

As Darling Maga Magomedov is feeling my soulful torments. It’s a bit of a mess. I’m arguing that I’ve been able to avoid any damage to the Russian classical literature. Having uttered “Danga come on” Maga did not say anything more, believing that he had said quite enough. But his silence also didn’t bode well.

Worm me or man? – I couldn’t have been able to read it, I was thinking about it. Dostoevsky. So what the fuck? Why? Why is the world so crappy?

Squeezed between Dagestanis and Siberians, as if between Scylla and Charybdis, I stood and thought out my remark. Finally, it was in the past that I got out of protracted hibernation and stepped boldly on the stage. Born to fly I began to improvise. I’m a ballerina from the Bolshoi Theater, I could wash her marriage. The ice has broken. Maga patted me on the shoulder approvingly. I’m a person who has been respected.


Brings together people like drinking alcoholic beverages together. It can be seen that he has been able to pay for it. Table laid in the Lenkomnat. Using the mighty charisma The dining dress fry the potatoes. Serega sent some fighter for vodka. And so, the most worthy people of the first company sat down to dine. In addition to Magomedov and Tomilin, the Ingush Misha Yevloyev, Tolik Chuprov, nicknamed Andrei Voronov, who came to the rescue. Are not passed face control.

Somewhere after the fourth glass, I’ve been previously recognized outstanding people. Maga Magomedov He always had a chance to hang out at the railway station.

It was a good idea to get a word out.

Misha Yevloev would like to play the villains. He has been grabbed with a death grip. Commissar to think about, defining Misha to the construction battalion? Misha should serve in the sabotage squad. Blow up, burn, kill, rob, torture prisoners of war. And then move on to California and make a dizzying career at Columbia Pictures.

It is a gift. He said that he could be placed in the cells of the prisoner of parasites.

As for Andrey Voronov, he like me, possessed powerful creative abilities. No wonder the battalion set him a club. If Misha Yevloyev was supposed to be an actor, then Voronov was supposed to be a director. Or playwright. Or, at worst, a rock musician. And he could become a writer, screenwriter, composer, painter. Here is how many sided talent he possessed. Not talent, talent!

After talking about art First put “Hamlet”, then – “Stroybat”, the drama, then something else. We made plans, not suspecting that we’ve already made some adjustments in our future.

At that moment, when it was a rat and he thought it was enthusiastically on his hands, while he was on it, he talked about it, materialized it. Lenkomnat. It is a rule that has been taken. Problems were not long in coming.

Houston, can you hear me? We have …

I went out to cast. There was no room on the nightstand, but there was no room for a reason. Mom dear!

Ensign Maksimushkin snaked on the floor. Oh my god Even after many years, his face still stands before my eyes. It wasn’t been a person who has been living for a long time. At the same time, the blood flow from a terrible wound on the head.

The ensign didn’t say anything, but only only moaned.

– Aaaaaaa, ayyyy, aaaaaa, ayyyy.
– What is the matter with you comrade ensign? – Bending over the company company foreman, I asked. At that time, the army reality hadn’t yet squeezed the remnants of intellectual education from me. I couldn’t just recumbent like that. Max made a short pause, gathering his strength, and with a whistle, exhaling air, began to speak.
– Seals?
– I.
– Listen here, soldier. The company is surrounded by …
– By whom? Who is surrounded by comrade ensign?

The pressure in the cranium immediately jumped up. Did the mean imperialists, taking advantage of the central government, decided to attack? But where we are and where they are. So, it turns out, they landed troops. And then, there are many such mouths. Our cities are like 1941, only many times better? A curse! So, the long-suffering demob is canceled after a year and a half …

– Whom is surrounded, comrade ensign?
– Aliens – hoarse Max – aliens from space.

Cold sweat poured down Once we drink out of my head. Well this is necessary, aliens from space! What do they need from us, earthlings? After destroying humanity? Or turn people into some kind of working cattle? If you are not satisfied with this option?

It was not believed. The disfigured physiognomy of the company sergeant spoke for itself.
So, you need to fight back, organize resistance to the aggressor! But Pasaran! Or we them, or they us!
Somehow I’m sitting on the fifth point, I’m coming to Lenkomnatu,

The truth is somewhere

Serega Tomilin takes out a cigarette and matches from his pocket. If you have signed it on the Arctic Circle.

– Boys! Do not let them break through the defense! It is now, it is nowhere to retreat. It means that they will break through everywhere. In Moscow, Ukraine, Babaystan, on Kamchatka.

Finally, he fell silent and hungry in the air. It was not thinking about how to save your own skin. Patriotism is patriotism, but it hasn’t been canceled. It was a shrill silence. Suddenly there was an ominous creak. We jumped into the corridor. In the darkness flashed his face.

– Oh, you bitch!

Tolik Chuprov gave the fighter a tasty slap in the face. And then I understood the reason for this reaction. A man is standing in the street. Stumble, it’s clear that it’s clearly a betrayed his other essence. Tomilin cut from the right. The orc squirmed and wept

– Where are the others? Where is the police officer?
– Do not understand … My do not understand … – he rattled.

Maga kicked the already defeated enemy with his foot. His example was followed by the rest. Indecent, that is, zapadlo.

– Where Where are the rest, your mother?

It’s not clear how the junior sergeant with the red dressing is turned on

– Own or a stranger? Voronov yelled, simultaneously grabbing the corporal by the throat.
– Your, your …
– How many days before the order? – maliciously grinning, asked Yevloev.
– Forty six …
“Where are you from?”
– From Irkutsk …

It seems, really, your own.

– Strangers in the company there?
– There is. I follow them myself – the corporal whispered. It was soon realized that it was not a sign of it. And most importantly, those who didn’t drive, they simply didn’t bait the bikes, they simply entered.
– How many are there?
– Seven or eight … – (So, it turns out, the amphibious-diversionary group) – I didn’t know how they entered. I’m looking for excuses.

It seems to be the right sourced from the flying saucer and left here. Building an entire company in such a situation is dangerous. Enemies can slip away. Only one way out – and a crush, crush reptiles.

Attack reflection

Divided into two groups, we walked between the beds, trying to determine ours and who was a stranger. There were some kind of geeks in vain. And rightly so, nefig poke on our Earth. One of the strangers, jumping up from the bed, rushed to the window. It was not there. Having caught up, Misha Evloev knocked him to the floor, and the Rat otvovar vrazhin with his feet.

The barracks looked like a disturbed hive. I was taken aback for a second. On the bed of a vampire. He has been exposed to his hands. Backed up for bedding, which immediately, falling off the bed. Leaping to the floor, he jumps up to the bottom of the barracks. They rushed at us. Makhach began. Someone smashed into my right. I’m freaking out Near me flashed the face of a stranger. Small dragon’s horns appeared among the black curly hair. I immediately jumped aside. The stool thrown from my head. I don’t have time to recharge them.

Finally, all eight aliens were herded into the Lenkomnatu. It was necessary to decide what to do with them further. Hand over to command or destroy on the spot. And then what? What to do next? Where to go? Or stay in place? Nobody knew that. Even, peering down from the wall, comrades V.I. Lenin. Suddenly opens the door to Lenin’s room. His eyes burned with anger. Max was shaking it all over, but he was approaching us like a zombie.

– What freaks? Think greyhounds? Do you think I will not find a govt? All my zapper in disbat! You will work on the tungsten mines until you die. Then followed a continuous mat.
– Your mom! – Misha Evloev gave him the left. The ensign crashed to the floor with a crash.
– Well, everything, goat, I will not leave it to you.

Rising to his feet, and his hitter … And then it hit me. This wasn’t our ensign, but some cosmic werewolf who moved to his astral body. I hunch with my brothers in arms. And the evil newcomer had a blaster at us. Second and all. This pimple will crush us into atoms. A shot rang out. I automatically closed my eyes. Maga, Tomilin and Voronov with great difficulty restrained his mental impulses. How much power was in this animal! Here his ensign again spoke in his voice. A common phenomenon, sometimes when an animal is pi … sh, it turns into a human again.

– Guys, a stranger in me! He didn’t want to go out, bastard! Therefore, I order, beat me alive, as long as this creature doesn’t die in me! Otherwise, it will be a star!


An order is an order. Having been surrounded by a ring with a ring. Angrily hissing, the astral body tried to cover its head. Suddenly, an air-raid alarm sounded. Then the paratroopers are broken.

– To the ground! – rang out over the ear – To the ground! Shoot the fuck up!

I realized that the fight began. It was a jump in the darkness of the room.

I woke up in the hospital. We won. Alien aliens caught in the shot. So this is the commander’s battalion commander, who called before this. It turns out that these creatures landed not only with us. They are attacked at a military training station near Poltava, a military training station on the Turkish border. And everywhere the enemy was thrown away. Returns to duty. All my homies were transferred to a special secret part. They are trained in saboteurs and it seems.

Research secretary. The head doctor says, “I’ve come to a show of paranormal abilities. I see who will be in the future. I can eat glass. I can add and multiply five-digit numbers in my mind. I know nine foreign languages. I am in a football match. I can temporarily move to another body, even to the female, even to a dog.

The Communists were dispersed after the August putsch. Auntie was not alone for long. Such natural data, is her sin to disappear. She went to America, where she married Chuck Palahniuk. Once you’ve been on a trip to the States of the Hollywood. They’re just working in this genre.

Alex Neronov

Humorous story &# 171; How I saved my army ensign&# 187;

Like this post? Please share to your friends:
Leave a Reply

;-) :| :x :twisted: :smile: :shock: :sad: :roll: :razz: :oops: :o :mrgreen: :lol: :idea: :grin: :evil: :cry: :cool: :arrow: :???: :?: :!:

SQL - 69 | 0.284 сек. | 8.18 МБ